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A key skill for TAGFEE leaders, one I kind of suck at. I'm often (rightly!) accused of covering up negative feedback with positive comments instead of engaging directly and honestly. Need to work on that BIG-time. :)
I knowwww. One of my strengths is positivity--which is a double-edged sword for obvious reasons. I learned how to give feedback effectively at SEOmoz because they worked hard to create an environment where it's safe and highly encouraged to do so. A big part of learning to provide feedback is feeling like it's a "safe" environment to do it in. The steps in the post here are good ways to provide feedback even in hostile environments. I'd like to see a section on the spectrum of reactions from your colleague and how to respond. (Ooh, that's feedback for the article!)